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Q & A with Father Anthony

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What should I do, I feel like I am not being fulfilled inside me?

Christina asks:

Dear Fr Anthony,

For the longest time, so many people in my home parish are saying that I would make a great sister, I am not sure if that is what God is calling me too. I spent a year at bible school and I love the church so much. Could you help me? I am feeling lost and frustrated, I am frustrated with my present job right now. I feel something is not being fulfilled inside me. I can't mention any of my feelings at work because they think that I am weird. I am so confused and I don't know who to talk to anymore. Please help me, I am about to lose hope for my life direction. Thanks Christina


Dear Christina,

The last thing you should do is lose hope.

It seems that your problem is mainly that you have no-one to turn to and open yourself up to about your vocation in order to receive sound advice. Outside of that, you seem to have inklings of the vocation yourself, yet you are not sure. You are frustrated with your present job, feeling unfulfilled, and people keep saying you would make a great sister.

Let's look at the positive elements in all of this. You have not closed your soul to the vocation; you have not rejected it. This is important. You are searching and the search is coming from inside your soul, which is not yet at rest. That is also good. And you obviously want to do what is right, while realizing that on your own you are likely to make a mistake. All of these are on the positive side, they are working in favor of you finding the right answer, so you have every reason to hope.

Let's look now at the negative, and I can see one big one: You don't seem to have a spiritual director you can work with. Our weaknesses or confusion are not necessarily negatives, because they mostly send us looking in the right direction—toward God, toward prayer. As a matter of fact, the biggest negative of all would be to think we have everything worked out and need no-one’s help at all, not even God’s. So, instead of getting frustrated with it, you simply need to begin to pray from your weakness, humbly, patiently, knowing that God knows your needs and is the first one to want to fulfill them.

There are several ways to find a spiritual director. One, perhaps the simplest, is to look up a religious order that interests you and go speak to the vocations director. Also, if you let me know where you live I may be able to connect you with a qualified spiritual director. Thirdly, you may want to take the bold step of directly approaching a local priest who has a good reputation as a confessor, and ask him if he will direct you.

God bless. Be sure of my prayers.

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