Year IV, Number 33

“The eyes of all in the synagogue were fixed on him” (Lk 4:20). What the evangelist Luke says about the people in the synagogue at Nazareth that Sabbath, listening to Jesus’ commentary on the words of the prophet Isaiah which he had just read, can be applied to all Christians. They are always called to recognize in Jesus of Nazareth the definitive fulfillment of the message of the prophets: “And he began to say to them, ‘Today this Scripture has been fulfilled in your hearing’” (Lk 4:21). The “Scripture” he had read was this: “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed, to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord” (Lk 4:18-19; cf. Is 61:1-2). Jesus thus presents himself as filled with the Spirit, “consecrated with an anointing,” “sent to preach good news to the poor.” He is the Messiah, the Messiah who is priest, prophet and king.

These are the features of Christ upon which the eyes of faith and love of Christians should be fixed. Using this “contemplation” as a starting point and making continual reference to it, the synod fathers reflected on the problem of priestly formation in present-day circumstances. This problem cannot be solved without previous reflection upon the goal of formation, that is, the ministerial priesthood, or more precisely, the ministerial priesthood as a participation - in the Church - in the very priesthood of Jesus Christ. Knowledge of the nature and mission of the ministerial priesthood is an essential presupposition, and at the same time the surest guide and incentive toward the development of pastoral activities in the Church for fostering and discerning vocations to the priesthood and training those called to the ordained ministry.

Q. Dear Fr Anthony,

Hi! I don't really know what to say, but I want to share my story with you. When I was 8, I really wanted to be a priest, and I even played with my friends: I made my own altar and stuff (back in the Philippines). But as I grew older - I don’t really know what happened to me - I lost interest. Then, when I was 15, I felt God’s call again. But I don’t want to be a priest now; I just want to serve him with all my heart, mind and soul and love him each day of my life. I don’t really know what to do. I know I couldn’t escape this; besides that, I want to offer my life to God. I was inspired by St Therese and my favorite saint, Sr Faustina. I’m really devoted to the Divine Mercy, but now I feel like I’m losing my connection with God. I always pray, but I don’t feel like it’s coming from my heart. I don't really know what to do; please help!

- Raul

A. Dear Raul,

You say you try to pray, but you don’t feel like it is coming from your heart. You also say that you want to serve God with all your heart, mind and soul, but at the same time you don’t want to be a priest. There is a connection. It is normal for us to want to put limits on God, to love and respect him but not want him to interfere with our plans. The way we overcome this division in our hearts is prayer, but at the same time even though we want to love him we instinctively pull back in prayer because we know that really, in the bottom of our hearts, we don’t want him to upset our plans. So we shy away from putting our hearts into prayer for fear of the outcome we know prayer will have if we pray sincerely.

Raul, that’s the way we are made, or rather, it is the fallen nature we have. So what can we do?

First, prayer fortunately is not all that difficult. Start where you are. Ask Christ to help you; tell him that you want to pray but there is something holding you back, and that is the fear you have that he will ask you to be a priest and you don’t feel like it. But tell him also that the problem is that you don’t know him enough, because there are other things that attract you. Every time you pray, tell him this, whether it is after Communion, or before praying the chaplet of the Divine Mercy, or whatever other prayers you say.

After that introduction, just say your normal prayers and ask Christ to come in and change your heart.

Then, when you pray always ask Mary to help you to want what Christ wants.

I hope these pointers help. God bless.

- Fr Anthony

Q. Dear Father,

Hi. I was just wondering: if you have a big vocation, such as if you want to be a singer and a nun, how do you know what you want to be if you want to be both? When do you know? Thank you!

- Pam

A. Dear Pam,

There are two opposite directions we can approach vocation from. One is what WE think, feel, prefer, and want. The other is what HE thinks, feels, prefers, and wants. Your question can only be answered by making the leap to the second dimension or direction. You already know you want to be both, but have the feeling it may not be possible to combine them. OK. That’s as far as you can go from the direction you are taking.

Now, try the other direction. How? You have to look into orders. (You may already be interested in some particular one.) As you visit or get to know them, God will let you know in his own way where he is calling you. Your singing may be used many ways to give glory to God, but you are probably thinking of a career on stage. How much of that is just a dream? How much is a real possibility? I think you should give priority to the vocation, and if your talent for music can be developed there, so much the better. But don’t leave the vocation aside for your music. God bless.

- Fr Anthony

I felt God’s call when I was fourteen. It was May. On May afternoons we used to pray the rosary at the parish, as an act of devotion to Mary. We also used make a beautiful floral offering. That day I was on my way home from praying the rosary at the parish when I met two nuns who were in Cotija, away from their communities for reasons of health and because of the religious persecution. They stopped to chat and asked me where I had been. I said, in Mexico City with the bishop of Veracruz, Rafael Guízar. Since the religious persecution was still going on in his diocese, he lived in the capital and ran a clandestine seminary there. “And why didn’t you stay with him?” they asked. It was the first time anyone had ever mentioned to me the possibility of going to the seminary to be a priest. I asked them if I could be a priest. They said yes, if God had given me the gift of a vocation.

After that brief conversation with the two sisters I was firmly convinced that God was calling me to serve him as a priest. Each vocation is particular and unique. Mine came unforeseen, without ever having thought of it or looked for it. In that seconds-long conversation with the nuns I had the moral certainty that God’s will for me was the life of a priest. I really don’t have any more details to give you. It was all very simple, but I must admit that I didn’t harbor any doubt that my call was authentic. Later came many difficulties and setbacks, but I have never doubted my call. I consider this a very special grace from God, and I thank him for it every day.

I remember that on that May afternoon in my fourteenth year I returned to the parish church I had just come from after praying the rosary. I was absolutely sure God wanted the priesthood for me. At the time I didn’t know the particular circumstances in which it would happen, but I couldn’t doubt that it was God’s will for me. I know this is hard to explain, especially when you haven’t had that kind of experience. I thanked God for this immense gift and asked him to help me be faithful to him on this path as long as I lived.

Gospel: Jn 6:60-69

When many of his disciples heard it, they said, "This teaching is difficult; who can accept it?" But Jesus, being aware that his disciples were complaining about it, said to them, "Does this offend you? Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? It is the spirit that gives life; the flesh is useless. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. But among you there are some who do not believe." For Jesus knew from the first who were the ones that did not believe, and who was the one that would betray him. And he said, "For this reason I have told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted by the Father." Because of this many of his disciples turned back and no longer went about with him. So Jesus asked the twelve, "Do you also wish to go away?" Simon Peter answered him, "Lord, to whom can we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and know that you are the Holy One of God."

Introductory Prayer: Lord Jesus Christ, you are the source of eternal life and the bread come down from heaven. I believe that you are the Holy One of God, truly present in the Eucharist. I want to live your life of grace. I do not want to abandon you to sin. Set my heart on fire with love for you.

Petition: Foster within me a deeper love for you in the Eucharist and a more eager desire to live the life of grace to the full.

1. Spirit and Life

“You must eat my flesh and drink my blood in order to have eternal life.” Imagine hearing this for the first time. These words are hard words; words almost ludicrous. Ones only accepted by the gift of faith, but words that are truly spirit and life.

The Catechism states “Believing is possible only by grace and the interior helps of the Holy Spirit" (Catechism of the Catholic Church, # 154). To accept the Eucharist Lord, the first step is faith. This faith then opens the doorway into a new spirit and life. This is the spirit and life received at Baptism. “The fruit of Baptism, or baptismal grace, is a rich reality that includes forgiveness of original sin and all personal sins, birth into the new life by which man becomes an adoptive son of the Father, a member of Christ and a temple of the Holy Spirit. By this very fact the person baptized is incorporated into the Church, the Body of Christ, and made a sharer in the priesthood of Christ" (Catechism of the Catholic Church, # 1279).

All these incredible gifts, O Lord, hinge upon faith. Deepen my faith in your spirit and life. Teach me a greater appreciation of the gifts that I possess only by faith. I would still be dead in sin, I would still be shackled in slavery, I would still be lost, if you had not poured your life into my heart. Now I am your adopted son. Now I have a chance to love you forever in heaven. May I never lose your spirit and life!

2. Many Turned Back

Without faith, many of those who eagerly had followed Christ, turned their back upon him. Their trust was shaken to the foundations. This temptation to doubt is nothing new in human history, nor am I exempt from this temptation, even after Baptism. The quest to live this new “spirit and life” can fall under the same shadow of doubt. “Nevertheless the new life received in Christian initiation has not abolished the frailty and weakness of human nature, nor the inclination to sin that tradition calls concupiscence, which remains in the baptized such that with the help of the grace of Christ they may prove themselves in the struggle of Christian life. This is the struggle of conversion directed toward holiness and eternal life to which the Lord never ceases to call us" (Catechism of the Catholic Church, # 1426).

Every day I fight with my fallen nature. It is not easy. It is a tedious and exacting labor to reject sin, selfishness and my passions. Furthermore, I must conduct this battle throughout the entirety of my life. Will I turn my back on Christ when the struggle for holiness grinds upon me? Will I turn back when I have to prove myself by sacrifice? No, Lord, I want to stay faithful. I want to keep fighting for your Kingdom in my life. I do not want to betray your love and life of grace, which was bought at the price of your blood. Strengthen my weak will to carry out the fight everyday with determination, faith and constancy.

3. To Whom Shall We Go?

Christ then turns towards his apostles, piercing their hearts with the question, “Will you also leave me?” Their doubts wrestled with their faith. Their sincere love for Christ grappled with the seemingly unreasonableness of his Eucharistic proclamation. Amidst the storms of confusions and despair, Peter stands once again upon the water. “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of everlasting life.”

Christ is our only answer. Without him, there is no eternal life. There may be at times difficulties in understanding the faith, but as John Henry Cardinal Newman said, “Ten thousand difficulties do not make one doubt." To find life’s answer, there is no way but Jesus.

And as if that was not enough, you offer to me, O Lord, not just becoming an adopted son of God, but you offer yourself to sustain that life within me. To whom shall I go to receive the bread of life? “What material food produces in our bodily life, Holy Communion wonderfully achieves in our spiritual life. Communion with the flesh of the risen Christ, a flesh 'given life and giving life through the Holy Spirit,' preserves, increases, and renews the life of grace received at Baptism. This growth in Christian life needs the nourishment of Eucharistic Communion, the bread for our pilgrimage until the moment of death, when it will be given to us as viaticum" (Catechism of the Catholic Church, # 1392).

Dialogue: Here in the Eucharist I discover what your life is all about; love, boundless love. Rekindle in my, dear Jesus, the awe and wonder that envelops you in the Eucharist. Teach me to live the same limitless love every day, fostering the new “spirit and life” you give me. As the Church draws her life from the Eucharist, may I learn to do the same.

Questionnaire:

1. Do I ask for the gift of faith in prayer? How deep is my appreciation of the Faith? Do I feel and - more importantly - act like an adopted child of God?

2. When are the moments that I turn my back on Christ? Do I practice conscious and deliberate sacrifices out of love for Christ and souls?

3. What changes do I need to make in my life in order to receive all the grace and strength offered to me in the Eucharist? Do I ever stop off at a church on the way home and visit Christ who is truly present in the Eucharist, reserved in the tabernacle? How can I imitate the same boundless love Christ shows me in the Eucharist?

Though “discernment” is not the most important facet of a successful vocational search, let us nevertheless insist that it is necessary, and find a way to do it well.

Attitude

At the risk of repetition: if you are scared stiff of what a vocation entails, you will find it harder to be open and accept that it might be happening to you. But take heart; besides prayer there are several other relatively simple and practical means that can be of help to overcome this fear.

One is getting to know people in the walk of life (Community, Movement, Seminary...) that you are thinking of. Visit them, see that they are made out of the same stuff as you, that they had (and have) their trials, and that still they are answering the call.

Another is to try the life yourself. A visit. Long enough to get a good feel for it. If this is where God wants you, you will begin to discover the aids that God has built into that way of life for a poor, weak human being like you to be able to live it. This is a great vocation enhancer.

Another is to shake of all spiritual narcissism. Stop thinking about yourself and your gifts. Think about how best you can help others and Christ. Do not seek personal comfort.

Read. But read inspiring things. The Gospels. The Acts of the Apostles. Lives of saints. Their heroism can help us transform our attitudes. They can set our hearts on fire.

Prayer for enlightenment

There is not much - as a matter of fact there is nothing - we can do as regards getting in tune with God without the help of the Holy Spirit. This enlightenment comes through the exercise of faith, allowing faith to let us see everything in a new light. (Without faith your birth was a chance event explicable by the confluence of certain conditions; with faith your birth, life, is a gift given you by God….)

Upcoming Events & Retreats

(( Listed here are retreats directed by the Legionaries of Christ and Regnum Christi members. For a listing of diocesan activities and other events, click here to go to the vocation.com website ))

LEGIONARIES OF CHRIST

Cheshire, CT, October 17-19, 2003, Test Your Call Retreat. Ages 16-30. Contact Br Branigan Sherman at vocation@legionaries.org or at (800) 420-5409. Price: none.

Rome, Italy. December 27, 2003 - January 5, 2004. Youth Pilgrimage for boys ages 11-15. Price: $1,495 (includes airfare). Chaplains are the Legionaries of Christ. Contact Ray Arsenault at (902) 854-2808 or arsenaultacres@pei.sympatico.ca

Rome, Italy. December 27, 2003 - January 5, 2004. Pilgrimage for college-aged men and high school seniors. Price: $399 + airfare. Chaplains are the Legionaries of Christ. Contact Karolee Stauduhar at kstauduhar@msn.com or (407) 869-8263.

REGNUM CHRISTI consecrated men

Call Tony MacDonnell for more information, (301) 365-3205. amacdonnell@arcol.org.

ShoreLines welcomes your questions and comments at questions@shorelines.org. If you do not specify otherwise, your question may be posted in the Vocations Q&A section.

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