My name is Evan Lemoine and I am from Baton Rouge Lousiana.  A little over a year ago, August 15th 2004, I consecrated my life to Christ and His Church. But I could hear Him calling from a very young age.  Little did I know He had been calling me from all eternity.  When I was a child, my parents always referred to the parish priest to form the household rules, inviting them over to dinner on several occasions, and inviting missionaries to stay in the house when they were passing through.  To a certain extent the reminder of God's presence in my life was never far away.  In 6th grade, after I had already gotten the hang of Confession, I remember asking Fr. Jerry Martin, our parish priest, if I could bless him at the end, instead of him blessing me.  He laughed, gave me the absolution, and then let me do the sign of the cross on his forehead.  It seemed completely normal to me.

When I was in eighth grade, I remember walking casually into the living room where my parents were seated by the window, and I told them "I think I might like to be priest," and I passed on as if it were no big deal. This little nudge of God came to me very simply and I didn't really understand how grand the vocation really was.  What hit me the most were the Prayers of the Faithful in the Mass when they prayed "for all of the youth who God is calling to the priesthood and Consecrated Life, that they may be generous."  I would look around me, and none of the other guys my age even seemed to be paying attention.  I would get frustrated because I felt like I was going to have to take the responsibility if no one else did.

In high-school I wrote a research paper in my religion class about why priests should be able to get married, because I knew I wanted to get married, but at the same time I couldn't weasel out of the call God had placed in my heart.  I thought up my strategies to try to mix my plans with God's will.  Over all I just didn't think it was fair that God was calling me so early in my life, I didn't even get the chance to try my own plan for happiness.

So what did I do?  I started looking for a wife right away.  I was a sophomore in high-school already looking for a love that would last forever. For some reason I hated the relationship games that didn't seem to accomplish anything, never getting past the superficial.  I wanted an infinite love, and I thought I could find it in one of these girls in my class.  But as they say, "don't hang your hat on a hook that can't bear its weight."  No other person can satisfy the human heart, other than Christ.  All of us fail one another in this aspect.  Even a married person does not find his fulfillment in his spouse.  Rather they both work to help one another reach their fulfillment in God.  I couldn't deny that there was only one reason for my existence, only one satisfying love, only one perfect intimacy, and only one answer to God's invitation, "yes."

So I said "yes", I would go to the seminary right after I was sure that my girlfriend wasn't "the one". When we broke up, there was already another one I was thinking about.  I think that for my entire high-school and college career, there was only about a month that I was "single".  I didn't want to give God a chance.  All of my resolutions to go to the seminary started to fade away into my sentimental desire to find the "perfect mate". 

But finally, when I got in touch with an Apostolic Movement, on a spiritual exercises retreat, this call was brought back to my heart.  I had never really met Christ face to face until that day, and I was hooked.  I told The Priest, "I think God has been calling me, but I have a girlfriend I think I want to marry.  Does that mean I can forget about the vocation?"  And he told me that the first priority was to find out what God had created me for, before trying to build my life with someone else, to avoid risking my happiness and hers.  So from that point I started looking for God's will, going to adoration, reading vocational texts "Peter on the Shore", writing questions to vocation.com, and finally I went to a leadership course for catholic young men in New York.  It is there that I learned how to pray, and that I had my first encounter with Pope John Paul II in World Youth Day, Toronto.  He made everything so simple, assuring all of us that Christ really is the center of our lives.

I came back from the Course with a great fervor and apostolic zeal.  I started working in Christian Life Groups, Missions, and various other activities approved by my parish.  My love for Christ, for souls, and for the Movement began to envelop me, and I began dedicating more and more time and effort to my prayer life and apostolic work.  I was on the edge of finishing my Bachelor's Degree in English:  Creative Writing, and I knew time for decisions was coming up.  Was I going to keep dating?  Or was I going to give God a chance in the candidacy?  Neither.  I was invited to give a year to the Church as a co-worker, and I couldn't resist.  Finally I would have the chance to work for Christ full time, without the job, university, and social commitments on the side.  And at the same time it would give me the chance to let Christ show me His will.

After my graduation dinner I told my family and friends that I was heading off, sold my car, packed all of  my apartment into a storage space, and headed off to the Ignition Course to kick off my co-worker year.  It was there that I met Tony MacDonnell, a consecrated man, doing a 2-week mission in Chicago and attending the Youth and Family Encounter.  I was amazed by his testimony of the Consecrated Life, his athletic qualities, his spiritual depth, and especially his apostolic work.  I thought, "if this is what it means to be a Consecrated man, I want it too!"  I asked him to give a conference about the Consecrated Life to all of the co-workers so that they could all love it as much as I did.  But once again, as my heart burned for the vocation, imagining myself in that life, I looked around and saw that no one else seemed very interested.  It was something personal.  God was inviting me. What was I going to do?

I went to the chapel that night and knelt alone before the tabernacle, and asked Him, "Can I really live this life?  I want it, I finally want it.  But it seems like it's just a fantasy."  And I cannot explain exactly how it happened, but God lifted me out of all of my fears and calculations and held me in His strength.  I felt that I was above everything, and none of my little worries could touch me.  "Can I, Father?  Can I really?"  "Yes, Evan, you can.  I am going to be your strength."  So I went to Tony as soon as possible to tell him that I wanted to be consecrated and just wanted to know "where to sign up".  And I hadn't even started my co-worker year yet.  So when I began working in the Michigan, I was constantly imagining my co-worker life as my consecrated life.  My suit and tie meant something more to me.

I don't want to let on that it was all easy after that.  That was just the beginning.  I had to start telling family and friends.  I had to tell my girlfriend.  Thanks be to God eternally for their support, encouragement, sacrifice and prayer. Over the months, through prayer and spiritual direction, not only was I able to persevere, but I found the fire burning brighter in me each day.  On the trips to visit the apostolic school I was reminded of the first time I heard the call so many years ago.  I was surrounded by young men who also wanted to give their lives for Christ.  I imagined myself being there, already in my vocation.  And after all I didn't have to imagine any more. 

I have finished my first year, the Year of Formation, and am studying now a Masters in Humanities in the Anahuac University.  God has worked miracles and continues to work miracles in my life and the lives of all my loved ones.  And He has given me the grace to begin heaven here and now.

For more information about Regnum Christi Consecrated Men, please write to: consecratedmen@regnumchristi.org.