(John 1: 35-39) 

Our Catholic life is an intensely personal matter. There are certainly mass manifestations (as when the Pope draws crowds of half a million and more), but it is enough for the TV to zoom in on those faces at the moments of prayer to discover that there is a dimension to their presence and prayer that is not just communitary. We search in prayer for what God is saying to each of us individually. In other areas of our lives we may be inclined to ask what others are doing and take our lead from that, but when it has to do with our faith, with our response to God, that will just not do. We have to know what he wants of us as individuals. "What do you want me to do, Lord?" 

The next day again John was standing with two of his disciples; and he looked at Jesus as he walked, and said, "Behold, the Lamb of God!" The two disciples heard him say this, and they followed Jesus. Jesus turned and saw them following, and said to them, "What are you looking for?" And they said to him, "Rabbi" (which means Teacher), "where are you staying?" He said to them, "Come and see." They came and saw where he was staying; and they stayed with him that day, for it was about the tenth hour. (John 1:35-39) 

In our job- and career-oriented world it is easy to think of a vocation solely in terms of work to be done and a role to fulfill, rather than a consequence and manifestation of the personal love we have for Christ and he has for each one of us.  

the Old and the New  

Scanning through the vocations of the Old Testament, the element that stands out is the call to do a certain work. God has a job that needs doing, and the prophet is called to do it, whether it be to set the people free as Moses was called to, or Joshua's mission of leading them into the promised land, or the vocations of the various other prophets to preach to the people and bring them back to the ways of their Lord. In that process the prophet encounters opposition, at times outright persecution (many of them lose their lives in the fulfillment of their mission), and so he turns to God as his only refuge.  

There develops in the prophet a deep relationship with God. He goes to him to unburden himself, to seek strength, to argue, to ask what he should do, to express his frustration at the people, or his fear. But this experience and relationship with God is still dominated by the Old Testament understanding of God's absolute majesty, and the distance between him and man.  

Then Christ comes and there is a radical change, for he comes as Emmanuel, God-with-us.  

There is now communion and personal friendship. The fundamental experience of God in the New Testament is of a God who has come to save us from our sins by becoming one of us and dying for us on the Cross.  

He is our personal savior, for he saved each one of us personally and each one of us has to accept him personally if this salvation is to become effective in us.  

Interestingly enough, though John the Baptist was more than a prophet, and among those born of women none is greater than John, the gospel gives us the sense of a certain distance between him and Christ. Their paths cross, as at the baptism in the Jordan, but we don't really see them together.  

John was the last of the prophets, the last embodiment of the old order. Christ for him was the one who is to come. He was his prophet and not his disciple. He was called to point out Christ, not to be with him, and not to spread the kingdom he inaugurated. Is this why he who is least in the kingdom is greater than John? (cfr. Luke 7:28) 

the personal encounter 

With Christ, the mission seems to be secondary to the call, while "being with Jesus" emerges as the main element which gives sense to the mission. And he went up into the hills, and called to him those whom he desired; and they came to him. And he appointed twelve, to be with him, and to be sent out to preach and have authority to cast out demons. (Mark 3:13-15) He calls each one by name. 

At their first calling some of the apostles hear the words follow me and then moments later I will make you fishers of men. Others hear simply the call to follow with no hint given of the future mission, as in the case, for example, of Matthew the tax collector. 

We see the same experience in St. Paul. Christ came out to meet him on the road to Damascus. It was a personal encounter in which Paul received for the first time the gift of faith. It was an exclusive encounter because those who were with him only heard the voice but saw nothing: they stood by, speechless, while all this was happening, but we do not hear of any of them changing their ways in the same manner as Paul did. Paul continues that experience of Christ in prayer, and he tells us in his letter to the Galatians how he went away to Arabia for some years, which many commentators say was time of solitude, prayer and penance. No word to him for years of his mission. First he had to get to know Christ intimately in prayer. That was the most important thing.  

personal call, personal love, personal mission 

He said to him a third time, "Simon, son of John, do you love me?" Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, "Do you love me?" And he said to him, "Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you." Jesus said to him, "Feed my sheep." (John 21:17) Christ first verifies Peter's love for him, and then gives him his personal mission to preach and spread the kingdom.  

Christ himself in the hours of his agony in Gethsemane has words that allow us to see that he lives the same order in his own life and action: he is in prayer, his human nature is rebelling against the suffering and death he sees before him, but his love for his Father brings him to say not my will but thine be done. In his encounter with his Father in prayer he renews his love, and in that love his human will finds reason and strength to do what his Father wants, despite the personal revulsion he experiences.  

the place of the encounter 

Our encounter with Christ is an encounter which takes place through the exercise of the gift of faith we received in baptism, which allows us to discover him in the eucharist and in the gospel, principally, and converse with him there, nourishing our love.  

It is in this encounter, as you grow in your love for him, that you will discover the concrete thing he wants you to do. By learning to love him you will learn what he would have you do. Not that he is suddenly going to map out for you in detail your whole life; that can only be discovered one step at a time, and by taking each step he prepares you for the next. But the more we love him, the more we will think like him, and the more we will want to do what he wants.  

He said some words to Peter which tell us where our concerns should lie: not in figuring everything out, wanting to know what he is asking of everyone else, but in living our own personal mission. When Peter saw him (the disciple whom Jesus loved), he said to Jesus, "Lord, what about this man?" Jesus said to him, "If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? Follow me!" (John 21:21-22) 

conclusion 

We must seek Christ. Nothing else matters, and everything else falls into place when we have him. As the Holy Father repeats: Be not afraid! Open the doors of your heart to Christ. In prayer. In action. In charity.