Dear Loretta,

I think you need to readjust your reference point as regards the vocation.

Our spontaneous tendency is to see the vocation in terms of our likes and what attracts us. But these are only of importance if they are a reflection of Gods work in our souls, a sign of the mysterious, interior way he leads us towards him. So, there are some likes and attractions that are material and emotional, others that are intellectual and reasoned, and still others that are spiritual and based on our love for God. We need to take a step beyond what do I want to do, to get to the next stage of saying to God, what are my attractions telling me about what you want me to do; what do you want me to do?

The key to discovering what my vocation is lies not in coming to a conclusion as regards what I want to do most of all, but in discovering through the fog of our often multiple, confusing and contradictory inclinations what God actually wants me to do. Of course to reach that stage we must have decided that what we most want to do is what God wants us to do. I hope Im not tying you in knots.

So addressing your particular question, I would say to make prayer the central element in your vocation search. Increase your prayer-life, especially the frequency with which you go to Mass, receive Christ in Communion and visit him in the Eucharist. And in all that contact with him ask him over and over, What do you want of me, and ask him for the grace to love him above all things. At the same time, in fairness to your boyfriend you should not waste any time in getting in touch with the MCs. Be candid with them about your present situation and your past, and your thoughts regarding the vocation, and especially about your concerns because you are an albino. If they see no problem dont let concerns regarding what people might think affect you in any way. If this is an impediment to entering you will have there and then the answer to your vocation question. If it is not I think the next stage in your discernment is going to take some time (you will have to visit the MCs, probably do retreats with them, speak regularly with the vocation director, etc) and so I think you will need to take an interim step as regards your boyfriend. In my opinion, if you dont tell him what is happening and if both of you dont take time off from your dating relationship you will be making your discernment more difficult than it has to be.   

God bless.