Dear Dominica,

It may surprise you, but I don't think you should concentrate on improving your self-esteem or on convincing your mother you are really kind enough to become a nun.

What I recommend is that you reflect and find out (you may already have a good idea) what makes her say that you are "mean as a cat". See how much truth there is to it. So, the first step is a reality check.

Then start to do something to change. Most important of all is to have your own crucifix, and use it to remind you of what Christ is like (he even dies for his enemies, while we are mean to our friends). Every time you want to act mean, tell him you want to change and to be more like him. Also, receive him as often as you can in Communion, and talk with him and ask him for his help.

Then pick one or two of the occasions where some meanness or temper tends to surface, and really try your best, day after day, to change. Don't try to fix everything, just try to do those one or two things, and stay at them. The change will begin to happen, and even if it doesn't seem to be happening fast enough, the very fact you are making the effort will begin to make you a different person, more pleasing to God and to everyone else.

And if you have a calling to be a nun, you will be better able to follow it.

God bless,